To all of those who know me, all of those who do not know, and all of those who realise that the aforementioned groups will fit not-so-snugly into the same envelope, although there may be a quibble brewing over address and postage.

We do not use 'Z' enough in England. Why, it was only the other day that Mozilla reminded me of this everytime I typed 'realise' or 'specialise' or anything else it could find to have a grumble about. I cannot stop it from doing this and IT IS DRIVING ME INSANE!!!!!

Anyway. I went to Newcastle today, or 'Town' as you would call a city in the north east. Doesn't make sense? Well, Hey.

Hey.

Ho.

Woo.

Anyway, first thing I see is the usual; paramedic and police at the site of a bit of street violence, your average scrap over such things as a resolution to the economic crisis, the way to combat global warning, how thick and idiotic people can be, or maybe over the price of a pasty.

Or perhaps it was performing arts students. You never can tell.

I read this thing about performing arts once, how a guy phoned up a plastic surgeon and enquired as to the cost of having his penis removed, and affixed to his forehead.

Immediately I would have said "The price is the remains of your already sparrow like mind" At which I would have thrown a shiny object, down the telephone wire of course, and watched him run after it like sparrows run after things on their..little sparrow legs...
Right. Track. On track. The doctor in question...did he say 'No. That's an absurd thing to do?'

or did he instantly start pricing the new leather seats for his Ferrari?

Yep. You guessed it. He advised the guy that it may be impossible to reattach fully functioning, but the guy didn't seem to mind,
and hey, I see no problem with that man never ever having children.


Crisis averted The performing arts student pulled out at the last moment (lol) and all was well in the world, apart from him being alive.

The end.


Oooh, no, wait. There were kids giving away Ferraro Roche chocolates in the street (They were really spoiling us), but, let me ask you, if a group of street urchins came up to you offering little balls of chcolate delight, would you take one? Or would it be preying on you mind that you may wake up in the frozen food isle at Tesco three hours later with an appendage removed, only to look outside and see someone with it surgically attached to a teenagers head in lieu of a sock hat?

I thought not. As you may guess, they weren't selling like hotcakes. Or at all.

I think hot cakes would have been equally hard to give away for free in a street full of drunk and homeless people.


And then I forgot to get the cider.

Oh well.

Hey, here's the gallery of a girl that has confusingly been here a year longer than me. I like the doll like quality of her pictures, and I also thought it would be funny since she advises she is anti social. And a pic reminded me of a poem. Lots of pics are reminding me of that poem recently.

and she is anti social.

Enjoy.

Parental advisory: Explicit rabbit content